Right Now in We Knows Parenting

Our live show in Brooklyn is one week away! Get your tickets now at weknowsparenting.com.  This week Peter and Beth record early before she goes to LA for the week.  Bryn bumps his face on the wall and gets a mouth full of blood.  He does not enjoy it.  Maeven get spiteful at Peter’s attempts to stop her from repeatedly dumping out a box of paints.  While Beth is away Peter attempts to interview the kids, but forgets to plug in the nice microphone.  It’s funny, but boy does it sound terrible. The kids are asleep now, so deal with it.

Ice Cream on My Pants!!!

Beth drives Bryn and Maeven across the state and the only thing that stops the kids from going car stir crazy is a stop to a zoo, a couple of museums and a bunch of ice cream. Meanwhile, across the country in LA, Peter, with no children to worry about, does his first escape room.  Peter and Beth discuss the benefits of a physical books over ebooks, debate a future Bryn dating hypothetical and wonder what E.T.’s mom was doing while waiting for her son to phone home.

Sick-ish

This week Peter does his best to get work done after Maeven decides to take a sick day, Beth accuses Peter of having a “man cold” and Bryn has a lot to say… all the time. Then, while recording the episode a  technical difficulty forces Peter and Beth to re-record the same segment about emotional labor three times. Do they sound frustrated and tired? You be the judge.

Ice Time!

Bryn hits the ice for his first ever skating lesson and Peter gets emotional. The kids’ lies get more elaborate, Beth gets Bryn to use the bathroom by getting him to imagine the shame of peeing his pants in front of his friends and at bedtime Peter gets too into the mechanics of not only how an old woman could swallow a fly, but also of how swallowing a horse would likely kill a person.

Psyduck v. Charlamagne

Beth joins Peter to record this week’s podcast after a night out with the girls and three old fashions. Peter and Beth attend Bryn’s Pre-K parent teacher conference where they learn that he’s terrible with scissors. They sign Bryn up for skating lessons, confront Meaven's lies and Bryn’s potty mouth, and then discover that the Inuit people seem have it right when it comes to lying to your kids. Oh, and Beth loves Pokemon.

Liars and Cheats

This week Bryn and Maeven discover the power of lying and then do it a lot, very badly.  Peter visits the local elementary school to see the bilingual program in action. Beth and Peter discuss midwifery care in the U.S, take listener questions about “sanctimommies” and Veganism and then Peter introduces his hit new character: the male doctor who only understands what you’re talking about if your are talking about penises.

Milkshakes and Other Bad Ideas

At the end of a very hard week, things are suddenly good, except for the twelve-hundred calories of milkshake that Peter ingests right before recording, causing him to hate himself and everything else. Beth discovers a local infrared sauna that may or may not be run out of a van. Peter and Beth debate the merits of having a second child with your ex, unpack an international Would You Knows scenario and answer some listener mail about March Madness potty training, staggering bedtimes and more forest based pre-school. 

RELAX!

The family returns from a much needed, long-weekend, mid-winter, indoor pool vacation during which Maeven decides that she knows how to read and Bryn throws a beach tantrum. Peter shares an article about how a nation’s level of income inequality effects parenting styles. Then, while unpacking a Would You Knows scenario, in which Maeven can talk to dead people, Peter and Beth try their best to remain civil while discussing their VERY different belief systems surrounding spirituality, and in this goal, they do… okay.

Full Family Fight

Beth and Peter attend an info session for the local dual language kindergarten program and are now suddenly feeling very competitive about getting Bryn into the program.  Valentine’s day brings the first fully stress-free date night in a while followed the next day by Beth and Peter’s first big fight in front of kids old enough to not only understand what their parents are yelling at each other but also to respond.  Bryn demands that Peter apologizes to Mommy.  In this week’s Would You Knows Beth unpacks a Freaky Friday scenario that neither she nor Peter can remember if they’ve done before and then announce the first We Knows Parenting Live Show coming up in April.

Everything is… Fine

This week everything is fine and it’s totally weird.  Peter and Beth aren’t sure how to handle it when their kids are mostly reasonable and don’t put up too much of a fight.  Things are good… and it’s terrifying. Instead of complaining, Peter shares a bunch of rapid fire parenting “fun” facts including one about a city in India that drops babies from a 50 foot tower (and catches them). You know, for “fun.” Beth and Peter then answer some listener mail about how moms and dads prepare (or don’t prepare) for the coming of a new baby.

Snot!

Beth returns from her mom-cation to find that parenting is a bit easier when you’re well rested.  Peter compliments Beth for her handling of a Bryn tantrum, but mostly to take credit for the tactics she used. Beth and Bryn encounter a real life Would You Knows scenario and live to tell the tale. Peter shares a study on quality of time vs. quantity and agrees with the results mostly because it justifies his own behavior, Beth turns cleaning into a game, and some listener mail prompts the question: what to do with all this snot?

Beth Takes a Momcation

While Beth lives it up on her solo vacation to the Cayman Islands, Peter whips the kids into shape with the power of silence, clear boundaries, a strict bedtime and (more than) a little help from Grandma.  Despite being incredibly helpful with the kids Peter’s mom refuses to be a guest on the podcast and he’s forced to interrupt Beth’s vacation for a last minute recording, which she is, of course, MORE than happy to do. He then calls his best friend Nick for a spooky Would You Knows scenario.  And just when you think that one episode of talking about different names for vaginas is enough Peter and Beth talk about it a whole lot more.

Rock Lord and Pony Party

After swearing he would never wear his pink striped pants again, Bryn pulls a 180 and declares pink to be his favorite color. Maeven, with an unwavering devotion to all things pink, is not impressed and possibly a little bit threatened. For MLK Jr. Day, Peter stays home with the kids and attempts to teach them a lesson about inclusion by forcing Maeven’s My Little Ponies to invite Bryn’s Rock Lords to their dance party. Some rock/pony based biases are revealed. Inspired by a listener email, Peter and Beth wrap up the episode by brainstorming an appropriate, kid-friendly name for vagina — Peter makes a strong case for "hooha."

Bullied in Pink

This week Bryn gets bullied for wearing pants with a pink stripe on it and then starts having nightmares that he pretends to not be bothered by. Are these things related? Peter reads Bryn and Maeven’s answers from their new question-a-day “journal.” Peter and Beth discuss the impostor syndrome that comes with being a new parent and answer a listener question about whether it’s better to let kids learn by making their own mistakes or by you telling them what’s what.

We Survive the Holidays

After a week off and a mostly successful holiday season, the whole family returns home and finds that they must completely rebuild all the pre-holiday routines. Peter and Beth binge home improvement shows resulting in Peter throwing away half of his clothes, Beth relates to a twitter thread about setting clear boundaries with your kids, then Peter and Beth are defeated by the most detailed and devastating Would You Knows scenario to date. 

Mini We Knows - Sick Day

Happy New Year! To celebrate, Bryn decides to throw up at daycare. In this mini episode Bryn shares his sick day experience. We’ll be back next week with a brand new regular episode.

Would You Knows Year End Spectacular

After a brief week in review in which Bryn, the most performative four-year-old around, shocks the world by clamming up and crying his way through the Pre-K Winter concert performance, Beth and Peter dedicate the rest of this last episode of the year to the first ever Would You Knows Year End Spectacular.  What is a Would You Knows Year End Spectacular? Great question. Take a listen and find out!

Maeven is a Monster

Maeven decides that she will never sleep ever again leading Peter and Beth to slowly lose their minds while a sleeping Bryn seems entirely unaware that the person he shares a room with has been screaming “Mommy” for an hour and a half. Beth researches famous celebrity deaths of 2004 after Bryn declares that before he was born he had been dead for 10 years. Bryn learns (not only) how to cook from watching Peter and Beth, but also, how to act stressed while cooking.  Finally, Beth and Peter revisit last week’s Would You Knows? scenario after a listener accepts the challenge to make it more specific.

Sex… Awkwardly Acknowledged

Peter and Beth start the podcast by sharing something intimate – too intimate maybe – and Peter regrets it. Now that Bryn has started to cooperate more, Maeven has decided that it’s her turn to make everything difficult for no reason by objecting to all things always (expect for potty training which she is nailing). Peter and Beth then discuss some listener mail about the difference between abusive parents and parents that simply scream too much, and how to explain anatomy to your kids without reinforcing a strictly binary view of gender. Then Beth knitpicks another Would You Knows scenario about time travel.

Resistance Peeing

This week Peter loses his mind and in an utterly desperate attempt to get Bryn to cooperate threatens to throw away all of his toys.  Maeven begins potty training and may or may not be using the threat of peeing her pants to assert her power.  Peter shares an article about how girls views of themselves has evolved over the years while society’s hasn’t kept pace. Peter and Beth then answer some listener mail about “Resistance Peeing.”